Sunday morning’s message was about rituals vs relationships in our Christian walk. It was a good message, delivered well. But I didn’t receive any new revelations, no dramatic convictions. We then partook in communion. Again, it was a good thing – I confessed my sins and was grateful for my salvation. But nothing earth-shattering.
I usually find some nugget, some “something” during a Sunday morning service that I’m going to take home with me and work on. An application, an action. But that morning, there was nothing.
I returned to my seat after receiving the bread and the cup, a bit discouraged at not hearing God’s voice personally. I closed my eyes. “Lord, I appreciate being here. I appreciate what you’ve done for me. But I’m not hearing you speak to me. What exactly is it that you want me to work on?”
Silence.
“Lord, please. Speak to me. Just tell me what you want me to do and I’ll work on it.”
Silence.
Nothing.
And then…so very softly…
“Kristen…that’s the whole point. Nothing. Just snuggle up to me. It’s not about the action. It’s not about self-improvement. It’s about the relationship. Just cozy up to me…the way you watched your daughter nestle in to her big sister, home from Iraq. Snuggle in, like it’s been a long a time since you’ve been able to do that. Because it has. Snuggle in like there’s nothing more important, nothing more pressing in the whole world. Because there isn’t. Snuggle in like I am the most secure place in the world for you to be. Because I am. Snuggle in like you are the most precious thing in the world to me. Because you are.”
And then Pastor Pete read these words: “He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, ‘He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.’ Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence. He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge.”
Lord, help me to just rest.
